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| A prayer for a broken world, in light of the upcoming 30-hour famine, Invisible Children's "Displace Me," and the Save Darfur Coalition, as well as the heartbreaking tragedy at Virgina Tech yesterday.
Nehemiah's Prayer
"O LORD, God of heaven, the great and awesome God, who keeps his
covenant of love with those who love him and obey his commands, let your ear be attentive and your eyes open to hear the prayer your
servant is praying before you day and night for your servants, the
people of Israel. I confess the sins we Israelites, including myself
and my father's house, have committed against you. We have acted very wickedly toward you. We have not obeyed the commands, decrees and laws you gave your servant Moses. "Remember the instruction you gave your servant Moses, saying, 'If you are unfaithful, I will scatter you among the nations, but if you return to me and obey my commands, then even if your exiled
people are at the farthest horizon, I will gather them from there and
bring them to the place I have chosen as a dwelling for my Name.' "They are your servants and your people, whom you redeemed by your great strength and your mighty hand.
O Lord, let your ear be attentive to the prayer of this your servant
and to the prayer of your servants who delight in revering your name.
Give your servant success today by granting him favor in the presence
of this man."
-Nehemiah 1: 5-11
This is one of the most humble and touching prayers I've read in the Bible.
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| Xanga, it's been quite a journey.
Unfortunately, here I sever my intimate ties with you. I will only be updating you if I have something extremely moving, important, or pointless to say.
I don't know why writing here is never satisfying. It might be the name...it's just so cheesy.
So sorry. I've had LiveJournal for years, but I am now a full convert until I make my own website.
This is also just a simple test for those who are truly interested in the ongoings of my life and will take that extra step to visit my LJ. No more random reading from blogrings and such.
Me Write Pretty Today
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| The degradation of modern English has come to this...?!
I was very engrossed in my captivating Associated Press Stylebook (KILL ME NOW, PLEASE) when I came across this entry:
"definitely Overused as a vague intensifier. Avoid it."
Hilarious entry, I must say. Too bad I love using this word...spelled correctly.
It is a wonder why the entry did not go further to say, "And please, it is spelled 'definitely,' NOT 'definately."
There...you can't see it, but my Xanga text box just underlined that in red.
So I was curious as to how these people let that statement go unpublished because this problem is so prevalent among even my friends.
I went on Facebook to join a group of students who are adamantly opposed to habitually misspelling "definitely."
AND WHAT DO YOU KNOW?!
I searched groups with "definitely" and got NOTHING. ZILCH. NADA.
Neck cringing, fingers shaking, and insides dying, I typed in "definately."
500+ groups. "Definately" was included in their descriptions, as if it were the most natural mishap ever.
Oh. My. God.
I had to close the Internet window immediately and go back to the AP book and cry.
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| I am ridiculously behind in reading for classes. My body just can't stay awake or focused enough to be academically productive. This is a sad, sad situation for which I cannot find a remedy. BAH.
I wish everyone else in the world weren't so well-rounded. Life would be so very much easier if everyone went to the extreme and only did one thing in their lives. What is this "moderation is key" nonsense? It only increases the grounds of competition, which makes people like me, who cannot grasp the concept of being superhuman, feel inferior. Thank you to the genius who coined that phrased - you have made my life a continuous uphill battle.
Angry thoughts aside... =)
Yet despite all the body-crashing and self-scolding I have been doing ever since I got back from the IV/AACF Winter Retreat, I am gradually understanding contentment. Now, this makes life much more bearable.
God has been amazing. Even when parts of my skeptic mind do not want to accept it, He has been amazing. Every time my faith hangs on a string of questions, He answers me. I once refused to listen and walked the other way for a while, but now, God turns me around and says, "No, I want to respond to you. You have to listen if you want my answer."
And indeed He holds true to that promise. In this past week, all of my prayers have been answered left and right - prayers for others, my future (short-term and long-term), the fellowship, even prayers for BU. I must have said this before, but I cannot recall another time when my heart has leapt so much, surged so much that all I can keep doing is squealing (yes, squealing) or sighing with joy. I have known the heavy heart, and now I know a light, dancing heart.
Now I must remember this sort of feeling to protect me from my moments of fear and uncertainty. Those are still very prominent in my life, especially regarding my future. I am panicking a bit less about securing my future now, but I must admit that the anxiety still exists. I am aware of it every time I open Mozilla and The New York Times pops up as my home page; I feel it every time I walk into my JO307 class and listen to discussions about becoming professional journalists. The anxiety increases every time I think about this upcoming summer and know that I am not going to be spending it doing some internship.
And so there is my perfect segue into...
Yes, plans for Summer 2007 have been set, and no, it does not involve a journalism internship.
It still is and will continue to be a huge leap of faith for me. My mentality is stuck in the What? You're going into your junior year of college without even a summer's worth of an internship? Not even at a small, local company? GOOD LUCK in trying to outshine all the other journalists out there. (Not to mention that I have only written one article for my college newspaper.) I admit that I am slightly relieved that I do not have to worry about hating my internship, but even if I did hate the internship, I would have gotten my foot in the door. For the time being, I am only peeking through the keyhole. =\
So yes, right now, I am still overcome by a little fear rather than excitement or anticipation. A part of me is asking myself what the heck I am doing, but the other part of me, the part that has experienced the wonders of this amazing God, is encouraging me to feel excited for it - to allow myself to revel in this opportunity of ministry. After all, I firmly believe that God has paved the way to this summer for me. I cannot do anything but accept, agreed?
Everything I have written is a brief version of a very long story (such is the case for most of my decisions now, though), so if for whatever very strange reason you would like to hear the whole story (and the specifics I have purposely left out), ask me personally. This has already been quite a long entry, anyway.
Farewell, and please pray for snow. =)
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| I am forsaking my better judgment and taking a little break before I run out again in an hour and a half.
My life was insanity ever since school started again, and it is only the third day. I will not go into the lovely details of it all because that is just simply boring. No one wishes to hear senseless venting, nor do I wish to recount them here.
There have been, however, a few urgent things on my mind.
I must ravenously devour all of my ramen soon. This Nutrition class I am taking requires us to monitor our diet at the beginning of the semester and compare it to how we eat at the end of the semester. Even though I strongly disagree with integrating academics into my personal life, I have to change my diet for my grade. I dislike this because that utterly and completely rules out all of my delicious ramen.
Then again, maybe I'll say that all I eat right now is ramen, and when I miraculously start eating these "healthy" substances, the professor will be so impressed that I get an A on the project!
Ohhh...that makes me kinda excited. But something that kills that excitement is that I'll probably start being convicted by every calorie I consume anyway, all I'll be eating late at night will be carrots and lettuce, if I can eat anything at all.
I just got back from hassling Guitar Center about getting worship equipment. Spent an hour there on Tuesday night, and just spent almost 2.5 hours there today. A very odd experience, I must say, especially for a socially awkward person like me. While waiting for the employee to get through all the red tape, I just stood there...for 2 hours looking at random things on the wall. Just...looking...panning...
Well, good thing I was in the drums department. The guy in the audio department seemed really uptight, and would occasionally dig in his ear and flick out earwax. Egh.
And drummers (which include the drum department employees) are funny. I like them. Unfortunately, I am not often in the mood to talk and be witty (this is much easier in written word rather than oral). I just could not keep up with their laid-back banter. It was amusing to witness, though.
Enough of that. It's nice to see that there are people of the male sex who exist around campus. All of my classes are female-dominated. Overwhelmingly female-dominated. In my COM class, there are 2 guys out of 15 students. That's one example.
And...done.
-30-
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